Moms, Are You Even On Your Family's Calendar?

Written By debbie mctammany

I was chatting with a friend the other day. She mentioned the family color-coded calendar she uses for herself, her husband, and their two boys’ activities. Apparently, she is color-coded as purple. She realized that there were NO purple events on the family calendar.

Certainly, as the family chauffeur, chef, social planner, homework assistant, and don’t forget house organizer, she is certainly a vital part of her family events and tasks. What was missing were the activities she was doing for HERSELF.

Fast forward 2 months, and guess what is showing on my friend's family calendar? YES, purple events for her self-care. As a mom myself, I understand the struggles balancing all the responsibilities of parenting and working, and the household task list seems endless some days.

Despite the sprints you feel you are doing daily, remember that taking care of yourself is just as important as taking care of your family.
As a life coach, one of the things I help people with is time management. As I tell my clients, "Calendar it to protect it."

Tips To Prioritize Self-Care

1. Make time for yourself.

It is wildly important to carve out time in your busy schedule for activities that you enjoy and help you relax without your family members being included. It can be as simple as reading a book, going for a walk, or taking a class. Just the idea of scheduling time for yourself daily, weekly, monthly is super important.

2. Practice self-compassion.

As a mom, you often put a lot of pressure on yourself to be perfect. "Having it all" looks amazing and easy. Giving yourself grace and compassion, and showing kindness to yourself is critical in taking good emotional care of yourself .

3. Set boundaries.

It’s important to set boundaries with your family and others in your life to ensure that you have time and space for yourseft. This might mean saying NO to some of the numerous requests to help with your kids’ activities and other commitments. Also, starting to delegate to others can be a game changer for time management. You don’t need to be there for everyone 24/7.

4. Prioritize your sleep and nutrition.

I know this is a hard one, especially sleep, because those precious few hours after the kids go to bed there are always household things to be done. Your mental and physical health is a vital part of your self-care. If you need support for your physical health, seek out medical support. Asking for help is never a sign of weakness, but rather a sign of strength.

5. Connection with others.

Connecting with other moms, friends, and family can be a great source of support and encouragement. Choose the relationships that are elevating you, not draining you.

Taking care of yourself is not selfish!

Remember, what do the flight attendants say when presenting all the pre-flight information? In case of an emergency, you must put on your oxygen mask first before assisting others. By prioritizing time for your self-care, you will feel empowered and ready to take on all the parenting and life challenges you encounter.

Remember, make sure the color on your family calendar is being represented well with activities just for you.

If not, reread the tips above or I can help you as a coach. Sessions are available in-person or virtual.

debbie mctammany
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